citrus tequila chicken + thoughts on youth and twerking

if you're like me, the end of summer calls for alcohol and lots of it. anything to help forget that school is starting and you're a graduate student and you're surrounded by rowdy youths with their twerking and their bright eyes and bushy tails. tequila helps. tequila helps you forget that you wasted valuable brain cells learning what the hell twerking was.

i still don't understand what twerking is. perhaps that's a sign that i'm old.

perhaps another sign that i'm old is that i only use tequila in marinades now. i became obsessed with the quest for the perfect tequila lime chicken this summer and lo, this is the result. citrus and tequila are a match made in heaven and if you can't drink it, you might as well grill with it. it tastes like summer. the flavors are bright and everyone knows that charred grill marks make everything better. leftovers are amenable to being chopped and rolled up in tortillas with guacamole or - if you're more virtuous than i - tossed with a salad.


juice of one lime
juice of one orange
zest of one lime
1/4 cup of olive oil
1/4 cup of silver tequila
dash pepper
dash salt
1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts

my favorite part of making chicken is pounding the chicken out. it really reduces your cooking time and if you're like me, when you're hungry you're hungry NOW. it's also an excellent way to vent your frustration with life, the patriarchy, and the aforementioned youths. so pound your chicken flat with a mallet or similar blunt instrument.

mix up the marinade in a bowl and dump it over the chicken. close the bag and give it a good shake and massage. pop it in the fridge for at least an hour.

y'all are adults. you know how to grill. grill chicken to a 165 so you can eat it and not die of food poisoning.

how i grill. with a book and a cocktail.

sprinkle with roughly chopped cilantro and serve with salads. feel very virtuous because you're eating salad and grilled chicken. ruin it by drinking an entire bottle of wine with dinner. oops~

cheddar biscuits

you know what i love?

cheese.

my dad is from wisconsin. cheese mania flows through my veins. i don't think i've ever been to a family gathering where cheese wasn't present. we like cheese. cheese is a friend. if i have less than two varieties of cheese in my fridge, i tend to get panicky and anxious. there's sharp cheddar, cheddar, apple smoked cheddar, goat cheese, and mozzarella in there right now and it's still not nearly enough.

you know what else i love?

biscuits. really, any carb. but there's something about a good biscuit that just makes me all tingly.

these biscuits bring two of my favorite things together and add garlic butter to sweeten the deal. they're an at-home version of those hideously addictive biscuits at red lobster but with some fussing to make them special. they're dangerously easy to make and a definite must for anyone who also appreciates a good carb and cheese combination.

2 cups AP flour
1 tbsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
2/3 cup milk
1/3 cup vegetable oil
3/4 cup finely shredded sharp or extra sharp cheddar cheese
1 tsp lawry's seasoned salt

3/4 tablespoon garlic powder
half stick butter
dash paprika
dash dried parsley

makes twelve biscuits. adapted from the joy of cooking.

super professional sifting technique.

sift together dry ingredients. add milk, vegetable oil, and cheese. mix thoroughly until a shaggy dough forms. don't get precious about it - it's going to be ugly. let it be ugly.

it's fugly but it's got it where it counts.

drop by spoonfuls onto an ungreased baking sheet and bake at 425 degrees for twelve to fifteen minutes or until golden brown.

while the biscuits are baking, get going on the herb butter. first, the butter.

hey baby.

that is the best shade of yellow. shh. no. don't argue.

in goes the garlic powder.

aaaaaaaand the paprika.

mix in the parsley and bam. butter fit for drizzling.

oh hello.

check out those nooks and crannies. more nooks and crannies = more butter.

while biscuits are still hot, drizzle or brush on the herb butter. they're best warm but do not attempt to shove an entire biscuit in your mouth when they're fresh from the oven. it never ends well.

not that i know from experience or anything.

red sauce

there's a restaurant in my hometown that i dream about sometimes. no, seriously. i dream about garlic and italian house dressing and red sauce and wake up gnawing on my pillow. that red sauce haunts my dreams. i often proclaim my desire to drink it straight and so help me, i would. i would drink it warm and out of a coffee cup, i would drink it mixed with vodka in a martini glass. i would have it injected into my veins if i could. just get it in me.

this is not that red sauce. no, this is the product of me spending years trying to recreate that red sauce. lord knows i've tried. i've gone from aborted attempts at blending crushed tomatoes with italian seasoning and crossing my fingers to a nasty attempt at making sauce in a porcelain pan that led to rather crunchy results to this final product - a red sauce i feel comfortable with labeling as my red sauce. it's a recipe i've honed through trial and error, a recipe i'm working on all the time and it's a recipe i'm proud of. so hello, welcome, and let's cook.

the usual suspects.

olive oil
1 white onion, finely diced
5 cloves of garlic, minced

2 28 oz. cans crushed tomatoes
1 tablespoon italian seasoning + more to taste
1 tablespoon grape jelly + more to taste
salt and pepper

so first you're going to want to heat up a dollop of olive oil in a large, heavy pot over low heat. while the oil is heating, dice your onions and crush your garlic. slowly brown the onions and garlic in the oil until everything is soft and brown and your kitchen smells absolutely amazing.

(sidenote: is there anything better than this smell? no. no there is not.)

add the crushed tomatoes to the same pot and give everything a nice stir so everything can meet. add the seasonings, and stir.

now it's time for the secret ingredient. now, trust me. please trust me.

no! don't run! i told you to trust me!

in my bag-of-cats mind, grape jelly is like adding wine and sugar to your sauce but in one convenient spoonful. grape jelly adds sweetness and this nice, grape-y depth to your sauce. so shh. trust me. add that tablespoon. we're friends, right? yep. there you go.

no turning back now.

stir in the grape jelly and turn the stove down to simmer. leave it alone to simmer for as long as you like. i usually give it about twenty minutes to half an hour (and once i got sucked into buzzfeed and left it on the stove for an hour and it was okay, albeit a bit burnt at the bottom), which is just enough time for everything to simmer together and for the flavors to become best friends.

give the sauce a taste and see what it needs. it usually needs something. it's like a baby that way. if it needs more seasoning, add more seasoning. if it needs more sweetness, add more jelly (you're through the looking glass now, alice). i like to add some shredded parmesan at this point because cheese is all that is right and good in this world. get everything melty and bubbling and you're good to go. i make big batches and store it in freezer bags until needed.

yeah.

this sauce is amenable to being tossed with pasta, dolloped over stuffed shells, spread on pizza, or used as a dipping sauce. i would not suggest drinking it straight though. it may be a bit much for that.

hello!

i spent years threatening to start a food blog. in high school, i worked in our local public library shelving books and one of my favorite places to shelve was the cookbook section. i'd check out a thick stack of them and go through them, looking at pictures of really gorgeous food with ingredients that were damn near exotic for a girl with an exceptionally picky palate who ate chicken strips at every restaurant from the ages of four to eighteen. i didn't eat tomatoes, onions, mushrooms, and i was always incredibly suspicious that my mother was sneaking said things into my food.

growing up, one of my favorite places to be was in the kitchen. i grew up in a home where the kitchen was the epicenter and i remember being young and always in there when my mom was making dinner. (usually to make sure she wasn't putting any hated vegetables in my dinner but i digress). as i got older, i longed to help and by the time i graduated from high school and moved out into the big bad world, i could do the basics of cooking but i always wanted to learn more. some setbacks came my way and over the course of college, i moved home twice and it was always in the cookbook section and in the kitchen where i found solace. i learned how to cook. i learned to like tomatoes and onions and tried my hand at baking and braising meat. i started to learn family recipes and started making up my own.

i learned to love food.

i've learned so much about food in my life and i've always been eager to teach others what i know. yeah, there's not too much of a trick to making red sauce but there is a trick to making good red sauce and i want to show you. ground beef tacos are the easiest thing in the world but you can elevate them so easily and i want to tell you how.

(i've always been a bossy older sister)

so welcome to my blog and watch this space for recipes and stories and hopefully, a grand old time.

my name is allison and i think we're gonna be friends.